The Happy Mantra shocks us into behaving like human beings again.
It’s a light-hearted way to look at some genuinely troubling problems
The Happy Mantra for shoppers:
We all like new, shiny, pretty, or cool things, but if your free time is mostly spent on buying ‘stuff’, or talking about the ’stuff’ you bought, it’s time to recognise your life is boring:
- Schedule in at least three times a week to proudly do hippy activities, like yoga, meditation and spending time with nature. It has an amazing knack for putting real value back into your life.
- Don’t let yourself be tricked into thinking shop windows and sites hold the answers to happiness. You live in the free world; find more useful things to do with your spare time.
- Don’t go shopping more than four times in the year - don’t freak out, that is once every 3 months and unless you’re the Queen that should be enough (and have a budget for each trip).
- Brain wave - if you can’t afford rent, don’t go shopping.
- Why not create your own label by printing your name out and sticking it to your stuff? – its only one degree dumber than proudly showing off designers’ names on your branded items.
- If you have no problem buying a new shiny bag that costs more than a hospital in Africa - you should.
- Stop buying stuff, it makes you look like you have psychological issues.
- If you bought your stuff using a credit card and you’re in debt, your shopping trip has promoted you from boring to stupid.
The Happy Mantra for technology users:
Whether we are talking about people’s insane dependencies on their various pieces of technology, the social etiquette abandonment of the nation, or people’s inability at face-to-face conversations, technology has started to suck, big time.
- You can respond to messages when you are no longer having a conversation. It is not normal to stop in the middle of a conversation to respond to messages on your phone, unless you are a) the President, or b) responsible for pressing that big red button in his office i.e. nothing you do is that important.
- Don’t be rude. When you are in somebody’s company, you should recognise that it is that person you are supposed to be communicating with. Only when an urgent message or call arrives, should you feel the need to respond. Please see dictionary definition of the word urgent, if needed.
- Under no circumstances should you be interacting with technology in front of company, unless you are showing them something (awesome) with it.
- Each time you need to interrupt the conversation you are having, to interact with your device, you should apologise with something like, “sorry, I’m just going to respond to this’. That way you will be much more aware of the humongous awkward silence that you have just created and subsequently feel much more conscious of your manners for the remainder of the conversation.
- Make sure that family time is actually spent speaking to one another without technology present. It is okay to have a rule of ‘no technology’ for a certain time in each day, so don’t be afraid to enforce it on yourself and on your family members.
- There is a problem if you are in a room of family or friends that are not talking to each other, but who are all on their phones, or laptops, or whatever device.
- People who are in the same room, but talking to each other via Facebook, there is no help for you.
The Happy Mantra for people that love themselves:
Celebrityitis (I just made that word up) describes the disease of people who spend too much time sharing their life on Facebook and Twitter, with their many ‘friends’ and ‘followers', resulting in an inflated ego and a deranged sense of self importance.
- You suffer from celebrityitis if you go through your day thinking about things you could post on Facebook, Twitter, or other social media.
- Don’t expect praise from people on Facebook, instead, get out in the real world and do something that actually deserves praise.
- By the way, it’s not normal to count your friends.
- If your post can’t better someone’s life in some way, don’t post it. Cats, chocolate and shoes would fall under that category (unless of course that is a picture of a cat eating chocolate and wearing shoes).
- Don’t depend on Facebook or your news feeds for entertainment, or conversation. Try engaging with real-life family and friends.
- Challenge yourself to find other things to do than spending unproductive hours in front of a computer.
- It’s time to get a new group of friends if your news feed looks like this: discussing what your friends ate, or where they shopped, or what inane thing happened in their day, or what’s outside of their window, or gossip. Your social media feeds should read more like this: new and unusual things to see and do, culture and news from around the world, interesting facts, amazing sights, remarkable achievements from others, events that are coming to town (that don’t involve dancing and alcohol for a change)...the list can go on forever.
- Just like in real life, keep good friends. If your friends are mean, or hopeless get rid of them.
- Celebrities are supposed to offer something useful to the world, like discovery, invention, knowledge, thought, wonder and amazement – be that type of celebrity and no one will mind. I’ll be your number one fan.
The Happy Mantra concerning other stuff
- Don’t be a weirdo, you’re supposed to say hello and smile at people. Make it a point to genuinely smile at one person on your journey to and from work, or home each day. To remove any awkwardness or unwanted attention for the most part, keep the exchanges to your own gender.
- Hush the Donald Trump inside yourself. There is more to life than money and success. Try having a sense of purpose to start with and the rest will follow.
- If you behave more courteously to co-workers than you do to your own family members, it’s time to fix up. It’s not okay that your family usually sees the impatient, intolerant, arrogant, tired, or rude side of you. Even when you are tired and spent, there will hardly be an occasion where you show your negative character to your boss and co-workers – at the very least, that same amount of respect should be awarded to your family.
- Being tired isn’t an excuse to be rude. Tired people should just smile and remain silent.
- Say please and thank you with kindness in your tone more often - it’s not formal, it’s called manners.
- If you can’t start your day without coffee, it doesn’t mean you are part of a cool coffee gang - you have an addiction, which is a sickness and you should do something about it.
- You were not born a Tazmanian Devil, so don’t be so impatient. The problem is definitely with you if you can’t wait for things without getting angry. Waiting a few seconds, or minutes for something shouldn’t leave you enraged.
- You have a lovely smile, you should use it more often.
- Life is a treasure full of incredible beauty and opportunity - so STOP complaining. Not only because it’s boring, but you are not starving, you are not living in a war zone, you do not need to walk three miles a day to get clean drinking water, you don’t need to split a piece of stale bread between six people for dinner, you won’t be sleeping in the cold and rain tonight, your healthcare doesn’t involve blunt and rusty instruments, you don’t have blisters on your feet from walking to and from school. If you really must, think of other people’s misfortunes to help you realise the number of miracles in your day.
- If you have a problem, fix it. If you can't fix it, get over it.
- Nothing heals the soul like a conversation with God, find Him and stop to say thank you now and then.
Stuff Mother Taught Us